to feel at home in my life

Posted by on January 12, 2011


On Waking

by John O’Donohue

I give thanks for arriving
Safely in a new dawn,
For the gift of eyes
To see the world,
The gift of mind
To feel at home
In my life.
The waves of possibility
Breaking on the shore of dawn,
The harvest of the past
That awaits my hunger,
And all the furtherings
This new day will bring.

* * *

I’ve been away from home for a while and since my mind seems to have no space for blogging and traveling at the same time, I stopped blogging while traveling. I shall now cross “travel writer” off my list of possible vocations, though I’m not sure it was ever on my list. Actually there is no list.

We were in Tennessee and Florida (with a short stop in Atlanta in between), as usual, over the holidays, and gone for a total of three weeks. It was a long time to be living out of a suitcase and journeying by car up and down the vertical length of this country with two little kids, and something I will probably not do again any time soon. I’m tired physically and mentally.

I love the lines: “The harvest of the past / that awaits my hunger.” I am ever hungry to make sense of the past, and never more so than while visiting my childhood home in Florida. But it does take a lot out of me.

I have to say, I’m a huge fan of being an adult and coming back to the place where, as an adult, I now live, even if I cannot go outside to drink my morning coffee in the middle of January, and my kids cannot wake up and go straight to the sandbox while still in their pajamas, as they did in Florida, while I watched them, drinking my coffee.

Today I will probably write in my journal–not my blog–all the thoughts and insights harvested on this most recent visit. The project of making sense of life is not yet over. But I’m thankful to wake up and feel at home in my life–a gift that seems to come most easily when I am, in fact, at home.

Poetry Wednesday

  1. annajouj
    January 12, 2011

    Hungrily reading your blog just now, Julia . . . and as far-from-home as possible here, I love your line "I'm a huge fan of being an adult and coming back to the place where, as an adult, I now live . . ."
    This completely resonates with my own adult realization of how sweet it is to have a home, a space, of one's own. Thank you for your writings, dear one.

  2. Kris Livovich
    January 12, 2011

    Welcome back, Julia. I missed your insights into your poem choices and life in general.
    Nothing makes home feel better than travel. I can think of very few places I would rather be for any period of time.

  3. Beth
    January 12, 2011

    Welcome home. It is good to hear your voice again. There is really nothing better than being back in familiar surroundings after a long bit of travel, though personally right now I cannot help to wish and escape the confines of this home I love so much. Sometimes I question my abilities to be a good mother, like today specifically, but I guess it is a bit too late. More coffee and maybe I will try smiling a bit. And perhaps I will see you this weekend in Chesterton.

  4. Molly Sabourin
    January 13, 2011

    Oh Julia, it is so nice to hear (read) your lovely writing voice again. I am sure after a long journey like that one your head is full of thoughts, memories and realizations to process. Here's hoping you'll share some with us, your devoted readers! : ) And John O'Donohue – how I love him.

  5. Julia
    January 13, 2011

    Thanks, everyone, for the kind comments. It is great to be back to Poetry Wednesday, and reconnected with this circle.

    Beth: you make a really good point that I didn't explore but have thought about. Sometimes I feel like the confines of home are making me crazy and a crazy mother, and that I all I need is a change of scenery. But this time, while traveling, it was very clear to me that I am a much better mother when I'm at home. Maybe it is a little of both– a double edged sword. Well, maybe something to explore in a later blog post. We should be in Chesterton this Sunday, so I hope to see you!